Wednesday, May 19, 2010

the shoes that never let true love grow

here is a flip flop with buetterflies on it. i got it (and it's matching pair) last year in toronto with my beautiful friend michelle. i think we got matching ones. i'm not a big match-exactly-what-my-friends-are-wearing kind of girl. but, michelle lives in canada, i live here, even if we wore these flip flops at the same time, no one would be able to tell. not even us.

so, i busted these bad boys out of the closet the other day, and lily fell in love with them. "mom! are these your shoes? butterflies? wow. cool." she tried them on, walked around with them on, and the look on her face said one thing, and one thing only- envy. i don't like to spoil my kids, but i certainly like to give them things that they like. so, i busted out a sharpie, and i drew some ghetto butterflies on a pair of lily's plain flip flops. she couldn't have been happier. even though the result left much to be desired.

so then topher, who is carefully observing all the crazy goings-ons, grabs a pair of his shoes and also asks for butterflies. "no topher, your dad would not approve of butterfly shoes for you. how about something else?" he thinks for a split second and shouts out: "Dragon!" good one my son. except i don't think i can draw a dragon. especially not on your shoe, and not with a sharpie (the permanence of it all!) "sorry topher, mommy can't draw a dragon. how about a puppy?" (not as fierce as a dragon, but not as gay as a butterfly.) my son is so easy to appease. i love him.

so we wore those puppy shoes to our friend's house. and we left them there by accident. dang it! "puppy shoes???" topher kept asking, especially as he eyes his sister and her 'custom-designed' shoes.
"uh... we'll make you another pair at home toph."

we got home, and chris had the laborious task of designing new shoes for his son. chris grabbed topher's beloved yellow croc and a sharpie, and was ready to wow his boy with his artistic prowess (which for the record, chris is an incredible artist. he drew the picture that was the focal point of our wedding invitations.) topher excitedly ran over to his dad and yelled out: "DRAGON!" chris was mentally prepared for the challenge, as i told him about the butterfly-draong-puppy episode earlier. so chris starts drawing, and then presents topher with his cool 'new' shoes. "bunny!" topher excitedly exclaims. "no topher. they are dragons! roar!" chris says, defending his art. "dragon! roar! thanks dad!" topher says. again. so easy to appease.

you can be the judge of chris' skill. rabid bunny rabbit with wings? or dragon?

anyhoo, here's where the tragic love story comes in. chris took the kids to mc donald's the other day when i went to work. he ordered some breakfast, and found a seat near the toddler's play area (more of these are popping up here in the east valley, and it's awesome!) a little girl who was already playing there found herself to be a smitten kitten by topher's stunning good looks. she kept coming over to him and just standing close. topher was fixated on his food, and would occassionally look at her, trying to figure out what she meant by standing so close to him.

finally he figured it out. surely she wanted to see his too-cool-for-school shoes. so the next time she came over to him, topher immediately whipped off his shoe, stuck it in her face, and screamed out:
"DRAGON! ROAR!!!!!!!!!"  
the poor little girl ran away, not from fright, but mostly disgust at 1. having a shoe shoved into her face, and 2. seeing the love of her life yell at her with a mouth full of sausage burrito, with some of said sausage burrito falling out of his mouth whilst letting out such a ferocious yell.

and that's how topher relates to pretty young things who take an interest in him. and we are not planning on correcting him of his disgusting ways any time soon.


Brantonians said...

Perhaps my favorite story you've ever written. Submit this one, for sure! You are the cutest mom on the planet! Sharpies on shoes...sheesh. I never would have thought of that!

Crazy Watsons said...

That dragon is shear talent. Go big with that one! ;]