one day last week, i was having dinner with lily and topher at home (chris was working) and i sneezed. for normal people that's fine. i am no longer normal. i totally peed in my pants. not a lot. but enough that i had to excuse myself from the table so i could change my underwear and shorts.
but then that evening my girlfriend cindy came over to hang out for a little bit. cindy is also pregnant (maybe having a baby today? tomorrow? definitely this week!!!) and she has the sweetest heart. i told her about my dinner-sneezing-urination fiasco. she laughed and came to sit on the couch with me to give me a hug. but when she did that, she knocked over a bottle of water that started to get her butt all wet. she laughed nervously at first as she jumped up. she looked at the couch to assess the situation and was relived to see that there was a bottle of water spilling water on my couch. she thought that i had another 'outburst' and that i was peeing on her! amazing. that would have brought our friendship to a new and very different level.
then on tuesday, i was getting ready to go out with chris and some friends, so i put on a t-shirt and was doing something in the kitchen by the sink. i just happened to look over on my shoulder and what should i find perched there but a scorpion! A BIG OLD DISGUSTING SCORPION! omg. i almost died. i started screaming for chris to come and help me (he was giving the kids a bath) and so he comes running and i am for some reason trying to get the scorpion off of my shirt by running water on it. but then it started crawling into the arm hole and chris was yelling at me to take my shirt off. not something that happens often ;) so i finally took my shirt off and my brave husband proceeded to kill the scorpion with my tshirt. my kids were safe in the tub. though they were very interested in the commotion.
how did the scorpion get on me? did it crawl up my leg and back and find a nice resting place on my shoulder? did it fall from the ceiling? or was it in my closet and already on my shirt when i put it on? i am banking on it being the latter, so i have already told chris i need a new wardrobe.
in other disgusting creepy crawly news, i also found a gecko and it's dislocated (though still moving) tail in my newspaper last week. it's been an interesting and kind of disgusting week. i'm glad it's over. happy weekend people!